To Whom It May Concern

Closed for the Season...

2009-07-29T12:46:00.004-05:00

To Whom It May Concern:

I began blogging back in the day on MySpace as a way to say some of the things I felt needed to be said, but at the time I had no outlet in which to say them.
As my blog progressed, it somewhat told the story of me and life lessons that I was learning at the time. Through time, my blog has become a way for a lot of you to keep up with the happenings of our family. Lately, and let's be completely honest here, it's just been lame. The posts are few and far between and I try to come up with things to say just to let you in on the happenings of our life. Not that Belle and Ashton couldn't keep us entertained for weeks though.

Today is another new day for my blog. I'm closing up shop for the season. I don't really know what direction I want to take this blog right now. So, I'm going to sit and think on for a while. There are enough Coupon Mom blogs to make me want to gag! At this point I'm not really looking to make money blogging. I could post endless updates on me and family, but I find myself seeking solace these days. For those of you who genuinely care, I will be opening a new blog to keep you all posted on my family. It will be for invited readers only. So, if you want to be invited, you must let me know. As for me, I have so much to say, but I'm just not sure where to start or how to say it all...at least for now. Those of you that really know me know it won't last forever (or even long for that matter). So, before you think of stealing my catchy and clever hook line...think twice, I will come after you! ;)

I will leave you all with one final note. The garden has grown wonderfully. We have feasted on its wares all summer long. I made 18 jars of blackberry jam this week. I can't wait to share them with everyone. We have tried to share our harvest with as many people as possible. We have had a really great summer.

Belle is obviously bored and ready to start school. So, it's a good thing that it starts this Thursday (AHHHH!!!! I can't believe this day has arrived.) She is reading up a storm, and informed me the other day that her brain was "computering all the time". Ashton is just one amazing little guy. He is so smart, in an "engineering" sort of way. He can put together a puzzle like no other 3 year old I know. He also LOVES hard work. He is always asking to help do things. Last Saturday, he carried a dining chair across the yard. I tried to help him but was informed that he could do it himself.

A baby bird made its home in one of the flower pots on our porch. This week it fell out, and its mom obviously abandoned it. Brian and the kids rescued the bird. Belle and Ashton named her Annie. They took her to the pet doctor where she was well-taken care of and sent to a special home to recover.

I am currently reading Amos Yong's "Theology and Down Syndrome". I must admit I was a little envious (ok, a lot envious) when "Amos" wrote a personal reply on Dr. Alexander's facebook status...SOMEDAY! After 35 years, I have come to the realization that I really enjoy working with my hands - crafts, gardening, canning, yard work, etc. Was I born in the right century? Maybe I spent all this time and money just to figure out that I should have been a hairdresser!? (Just Kidding!!!) But, I am enjoying this break from school. School is just a whole new ballgame when toddlers are in the mix. I learned so much last year. I am also thankful that it is complete. I am also thankful that I had a wonderful husband who supported me the entire way and took a lot on his plate to help me finish. But, enough of that mushy stuff.

I found a statement on someone's facebook that has enamored me for the moment. It said that the grass only looks greener on the other side because they have more crap to fertilize it with. I think that is probably true. I will ponder that thought until LOST returns in the Spring and gives me something better to think about!!! ;)

Finally, my dear friend and her husband are about to adopt a new baby. They are about to launch their website which will tell their story and help them raise the funds needed for the adoption. So, please check back here for a final post with a link to their blog. I know they would appreciate your prayers and support.

I appreciate those of you who took the time to read my blog and even comment sometimes. Writing brings me so much joy. I plan to keep doing for a very long time, even if it is absent from this venue for a while.

Sincerely (and thanks for your support),
Kelly

DELETE

2009-06-24T15:18:00.008-05:00

It pains me to tell you that I accidentally deleted the video of the "groovin grannies". I almost cried. Ok, well I did tear up because all I could think of was all the money we would never see because it would never be posted to YouTube or seen on AFV. So the above image will have to suffice. Just imagine Elvis singing "You Ain't Nothin But A Hound Dog" in the background, and the three of them reminiscing about their younger years.
Our garden is now full of treasures. Those of you who are local are sure to get some. It is full of things that only I will eat. I still can't get over how big the sunflowers are. It really has been a lot of fun to see the kids watch it grow. It really is an amazing thing to see God's creation at work. Some of the tomatoes are now turning red. The tomato plant in the picture has about 30 tomatoes on it. We have also now picked two peppers and four zucchini. AWESOME!!!!

I haven't been blogging much. By this you could assume that I found something to fill my free time. Honest truth is - I let my kids stay up until almost 10 every night. It is so fun to play outside with them until dark! By the time I get them in bed, I have lost all motivation. I have been catching up on every TV show I missed for the past 10 months. I have enjoyed it, but it's getting old. None of them seem to compare to LOST, and I know I have better things to do with my time. I also loathe reality TV. So, what's a girl to do? Something productive, I suppose.

Back to our treasures...these are the blackberries that are also growing. I hope they are sweet, but I'm not sure we have had enough rain. By the way, I am actually going on vacation next week...at my house, but it's vacation none the less. I'm so excited to spend dawn to desk with my babies (who aren't so little anymore).
I'm not making any promises, but will try to keep you up on all the fun.

I have nothing profound to say. But, I will leave you with one more photo of me in my graduation get up. Yeah, I'm proud. No comments from the peanut gallery (yeah, that means you Nic). I know it took a long time, but at least I finished! Hopefully, the next one won't take quite so long.

Dazed and Confused

2009-06-08T14:21:00.002-05:00

I have had a lot of mixed feelings about this blog of late. I have thought on more than one occassion that maybe it was time to leave this blog behind and forge on to new and better things. But, I know that there are some of you who really want to know what is going on our little neck of the woods.
So, since life is slowing down a bit, I plan to let you in on some of the happenings of the last month...especially GRADUATION!
I will be posting some pics and videos. I also have a great video of my Mom and her sisters dancing to Elvis at my cousin Michael's wedding. It is PRICELESS!
So, if you gave up on me, please keep checking back. Besides, I have to do something with all this free time on my hands!

Update

2009-04-02T14:07:00.002-05:00

Hello Everyone...whomever you may be -

I am almost finished with my thesis. In fact, I will hopefully finish my writing tomorrow and turn it in on Monday or Tuesday. I can't believe I'm actually going to finish. There were days when I thought I would never get there.
Also, I made a 100% on my Counseling Skills mid-term. I haven't gotten my Gospel of John mid-term back yet. It is hard to believe that there are only 3 weeks of class remaining. When the thesis is done, I will have about 4 papers and a lot of reading to do, plus 2 finals.
*(As if you all really wanted to know the gory details!)*
The kids are growing so fast. They are quickly approaching 5 and 3. Belle went to the train museum today. Ashton is all about his "tricks". They usually involve jumping and crashing himself into the floor, couch or trampoline.
We had to move mid-March. Our big, outdated, 70's looking house was mold infested. So, we packed up the whole joint and moved - not before disinfecting EVERYTHING mind you. We are finally getting settled. Just for future reference...moving and writing a thesis don't mix. BUT, we had some great help. We were blessed with great friends and family who helped us get it done in just about a day and a half. You know who you are - THANKS A MILLION!
Also, for those of you wondering where the last post went. If you really want to know, you are welcome to ask and I will happily give you the answer. Otherwise, you will have to suffer in silence.
Maybe, just maybe, you will be hearing more from me after next week.
Until then...

Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow

2009-03-02T14:02:00.003-05:00

Well, since I never finished Christmas reporting, I feel like I'm safe using Christmas song lyrics for my title.
My kids are in this.....

...and once again the snow COMPLETELY bypassed good ole' Clevegas.
Honestly, my heart is sad that they experienced their first real snow without us. They made snow angels and snow men. (Hopefully, I will have pictures to show!) Evidently, Belle was quite the rage with her stories about the different types of dinosaurs. She is quite fascinated with the T-Rex who eats meat and "we are the meat". You just have to hear her tell the story.
Ashton, on the other hand, plays the shy guy. I think it's his own mysterious way of getting attention. Of course, once he decides that he likes you, he won't shut up. He is discriminating. Whereas Belle just doesn't care.
Anyway, here is another picture of the snow and even though it is dark, you can see about how thick it actually got.

I'm back to the drawing board!

Signs of the Times

2009-02-25T14:59:00.004-05:00

Well, it has been a month since I've written anything. I still haven't finished posting about Christmas and the New Year, Valentine's Day and Mardi Gras have all passed and before I know it St. Patrick's Day will be upon us.
So, here's a short briefing of life (for those of you that care) and for those of you just being plain nosey, you'll just have to wait for the juice! ;)
We had a great new year in Richlands with Matt and April Quesenberry and their children Luke and Anna. I have known April since my first semester of college. She is actually the reason I came back to Lee after my first semester. It has been wonderful to walk through different seasons of life together, and it is most fun to be able to watch our children play together.
Both kids are doing great in school. Belle is reading up a storm. Ashton is talking up a storm. Both of them are so precious, smart and beautiful. Yes, I am their mom. I am biased, but every word I just said was true. Belle had a "penguin program" in January - so cute! They both had fun Valentine's parties at school.
We have had flooding issues in our house that we are still trying to get fixed after more than a month has passed. I am almost finished with my internship. It has been a lot of fun. They have taken really good care of me, and I truly appreciate the relationships that I have been able to build there.
The rough draft of my thesis is due Monday. So, count yourself lucky that I took time to even write something. Three months until graduation and counting!
March will prove to be no less busy, I'm sure. The kids will have fun school activities and field trips. I will be working on the final draft of my thesis - along with the thousand other things that I do. I will thank God with every breath and continue to count the days to May 30th.
Lately, this blog has been a place just to keep you up on our life and to show you some pictures here and there. I'm sure that I will have some stuff to share later on, but for now I have enough writing to do. So, I hope you will understand. If you really need to read something from me, I'll forward you an exerpt of one of my papers.

See you in the funny papers!

Ice CreamIER

2009-01-26T10:50:00.006-05:00

Belle's field trip to the IMAX left Ashton feeling a bit left out. He kept saying that he wanted to take a field trip with Daddy. We decided to do something that we want to make a new holiday tradition for our family. The first Monday after school was out, we picked up Grandma and the five of us headed to Athens to the Mayfield Dairy. We thought that we were going to see cows being milked and the whole nine yards. Actually, what we got was a short video followed by a tour of the plant where they bottle the milk and package the ice cream. They have a cute little gift shop and an ice cream parlor. The best part was the red hair nets that we wore on the tour. It was really a fun day. It was so cold, but here we were gobbling up our ice cream. FUN, FUN, FUN!!! I can't wait until school is out in December this year. I wonder what new flavor they will have for us to try this time?

Fun Sunday

2009-01-26T10:42:00.004-05:00

School let out on Friday the 19th. Nana and Papi came to visit that weekend and deliver their Christmas present to the children. That Sunday, the kids also sang two little songs at church. This is also the same Sunday that they received their reply letter from Santa. Needless to say, it was quite a weekend. Both sets of grandparents were on hand for the wonderful song and dance (literally) at church. If I can figure out how to upload the content from my video camera, I will post video of that as well. In the meantime, here they are in their beautiful outfits and having fun on the trampoline!

Christmas Goodies

2009-01-26T10:12:00.002-05:00

Some of us love to bake and create at Christmas time. I am one of these people. Here is a picture of the lovely Rice Krispie Christmas Tree that I made for Belle's Christmas party at school. January is almost over, and I am still making homemade Chex mix (a long tradition in the Woodard family line!). I realize that Valentine's Day is upon us, and I'm still wrapping up Christmas. Without internet service at home, it can be a little trying to keep you updated at time. Sometimes, I think the people at Panera get tired of seeing my little face.
Oh, the kids at Belle's school also had a lovely little program for us that day. I will post video later on. I'm sure that you will love it. Meanwhile, bask in the glory of my creation!

Reply Requested...and Granted

2009-01-26T10:00:00.005-05:00

Well, I think these last few posts will be short and sweet to get us caught up to the new year. I think the pictures and the videos will say a lot.
This is a picture of the kids at the Cleveland Post Office. They set up this nifty little box where kids of all ages can drop off their letters to Santa. Both of my kids wrote their letters. This year, Belle was actually able to write it all herself. She did have to have some help with spelling, but overall she knew how to do it herself and was proud to let us know! The nice thing about this specific box is this - if you write your return address on the outside of the envelope, you actually get a letter back from Santa (with a lovely coloring page too). At the end of the holiday season, the Cleveland post office actually sends the original letter that the child writes back to the parent. Someone in the post office is certainly thoughtful and thinking of all of our scrapbooking pleasures. The kids received their letters back on a very cold Sunday. They were very excited that Santa thought enough of them to write them back.
So, for those of you who don't do "Santa" with your kids...PLEASE, don't ruin it for mine. These years go by so fast. I love to see the excitement on their little faces. Besides, I've decided that I'm like the guy from Polar Express - I may be 35, but I still hear the bell ring. Hopefully when my kids are 35, they will still hear the bell too!

The Polar Express

2009-01-07T15:35:00.006-05:00

Belle's December field trip was to the IMAX in Chattanooga to see the Polar Express. We had never seen the movie before. What a great way to experience it for the first time. We loved it so much that we took both kids back with a couple of their friends after school and work were out for the holidays. It is one of our new favorite movies. Although, I must admit that sometimes the animation seems so real that it creeps me out a little. One of the best parts of watching it in 3D with youngster is watching them constantly reach out to try and touch things! Belle kept sticking out her tongue to try and catch the snow. It was also a consensus that it was really cool, neat and awesome when the train almost smashes into your face. The video below is of the kids playing in the lobby before the movie. We all brought sack lunches and ate them in lobby before the movie. I forgot how much I loved field trips as a kid. It was just as much fun, if not more, as a Mom. I love seeing her smile. As a result of this fantastic field trip, we decided to take one of our when school was out. More details in a post to come. I tried to upload some cutie patootie pics of us in our stellar 3D glasses, but kept getting error messages. I'll try to add them again later. For now, you can enjoy the v v video.

Decorating the Tree

2009-01-07T15:15:00.008-05:00

...gets more fun every year. I'm so glad that we have a "makeshift" tree full of the wonderful treasures that our children have made. I wouldn't have it any other way.
We started decorating Thanksgiving night at Papa and Grandma's and moved the fun to our house the day after. Thought you might enjoy the pics of our fun. The first picture is a tent they made at Grandma's while we were decorating the rest of the house. Don't you just love the way they decorated the outside with stockings?

I just love this time of the year. Honestly, I'm sad it's gone.

Lee Christmas Tree Lighting

2009-01-07T14:51:00.005-05:00

The Christmas Tree Lighting at Lee was our first "official" event of the Christmas season. It was a cold night, but we had fun. The kids got to meet Santa and Mrs. Clause (although she was a bit overbearing and certainly a "FEMINIST" - even I was weary of hearing her talk of how Santa got all the glory while she did all the work!). We drank cider and ate cookies. At one point, we weren't sure if the tree was really going to light up, but alas it did. Grandma joined us for the grand event. Afterwards, we took the kids inside to warm up and play a little. The Christmas Tree became the "Kissmas" Tree as the college students cozied up for a intimate dance party. Let's just say that PDA certainly didn't bother them. All in all though it was a fun way to kick off the season, and we got a free photo opp with Santa. Who can beat that?

The Gingerbread House

2009-01-07T14:27:00.007-05:00

Our second grand event of the Christmas season was building our very own gingerbread house. It was so much fun. The kids ate as much candy as they put on the house. You know you're in trouble when you see your kids scraping sugar off the counter with their fingers. (It's even worse, when Dad swipes the sugary candy off the iced roof every time he walks by! By Christmas' end, our Gingerbread house looked like it had been through a hail storms because of all the holes left where candy balls once held residence.) It was a great experience. The kids loved it so much that they made a second house with their Nana when we went to SC to visit. Making a Gingerbread house will definitely be a new Christmas tradition in our home. Maybe next year, we will try the Gingerbread Sleigh or Christmas Tree or have a Gingerbread making party. I seem to be all about having parties at our home lately. If you're lucky, maybe you will be invited (HA! HA!)

Catching Up...

2009-01-07T14:19:00.002-05:00

Well, it has been well over a month since I've written anything.
I was told to "get to it". So, I'm back.
I'm going to split up the past month into several blogs. That helps us both...you won't get bored with one long post. And, I can take my time writing them.
Hope you feel all caught up in the end.

Better Days

2008-11-24T09:30:00.013-05:00

Once again we had a great fall weekend. Belle had her first sleepover at a friend's house. She did ask to come home, but stayed and had a great time! It's nice to watch Belle growing and coming into her own. While Belle was out, we had some great time alone with Ashton. We took him out for pizza. He chose the place - Little Caesars. He got to sing loud in the car without anyone infringing on his spotlight and drank his "spicy" (his word for soft drinks, which came from Belle calling carbonated punch "spicy punch") with his pizza, always a special treat. We always tell him that it's
Pepsi, Coke, Sprite or whatever it may be, but that doesn't seem to phase him. He just wants his "spicy".
Saturday night, we picked up Uncle Kevin from work, and he spent the evening with us. We watched a whole lot of Scooby, Scooby Doo, and ate more PIZZA. Sunday morning was filled with early church and lunch with Grandma and Papa. And, Sunday afternoon was the best nap I've had in ages (ok, so it was one of the only naps I've had in ages, but it was great!).

So, basically it was a somewhat ordinary weekend in our lives. I hesitate to tell the next part for fear that we will be chastised again for missing Sunday evening church, but here it goes. After Sunday naps, we went outside and made an even bigger leaf pile than last week. It was so tall that Aston couldn't even stick his head out of it. The kids played on the swing set while Brian and I raked up the leaves. We raked up half the yard. (Also, I must admit that Brian did most of the "raking". He was out blowing the leaves while we were finishing our naps). Brian would blow the leaves on Ashton, and he would laugh and laugh and laugh. We threw the kids in the pile, and they would push us in. We ended our evening of fun with homemade chicken noodle soup (made by Chef de Brian)and grilled cheese made on hamburger buns (I forgot we had no bread.).

These are the moments...not to sound cliche, but these are the types of moments that we all want to hang on to and remember. They don't cost anything but time and lots of love (ok, and a little bit of extra energy too).
Last year at Christmas, I got Brian an iPod. I only downloaded one song "Better Days" by the Goo Goo Dolls. Every family and marriage goes through its ups and downs. Last Christmas all I wished for us were better days. In many ways (especially times like those above) I have gotten what I asked for and more. I still tear up every time I hear this song. Faith, hope, love, forgiveness and the chance to begin again. Haven't we all wished for that at some point?
Below is the video and song on YouTube. I think this will be my only Christmas wish again, not just for me, but for you as well. May we all find better days...

Fall is for Friends

2008-11-16T22:40:00.013-05:00

Each month at school Belle is given the opportunity to purchase books from Scholastic. Last month they had an array of Thanksgiving books. We decided on a couple, one of which was titled "Fall is for Friends". Tonight we created our very own version of the book with our friends, the McMullins (Mike, Angeline and Sam).
We went out to my parents home, raked up some leaves for the kids to jump in and made a big bonfire. The wood was really wet from the rain the past couple of days. At first, we didn't think our fire would ever start, but PaPa had a can of magic (you and I would call it kerosene). After the second dose of magic, we all thought we would leave with sunburns on our faces. At the least the fire actually worked! The kids thought it was amazing the way the flame suddenly burst into the sky. It was a hoot.
We roasted marshmallows and succeeded in devouring the whole bag. Remember by this time there are 8 of us cooking away. Angeline and I were trying to take pictures and video.

So, we got the shaft on our share of the marshmallows. Finally, we got to the hot dogs. It was getting dark by this time and the fire was SOOOO hot! Angeline and I ended up roasting them all by ourselves, but at least it gave Grandma a chance to actually take our picture.
We took our roasted hot dogs up to the house where Grandma had made spinach dip and brownies. We heated up some homemade chili and dug in (all while taking in our evening dose of Sunday football). It was a lot of fun. I don't remember the last time I roasted marshallows and hot dogs over an open flame.
Anyway, fall is for friends. Take some time to enjoy some fall fun with your friends too.

Chalk Monsters

2008-11-05T22:29:00.004-05:00

Here are some pictures of our fun with sidewalk chalk. This was back in September just after school started. As you can see, Ashton enjoyed coloring himself more than the driveway. I love my kids. I love my family. There is so much to be thankful for.
There are more fun posts to come!

So Much to Say, So Little Time

2008-11-04T14:18:00.015-05:00

Ok, so, well...there are quite a few things that I need/want to blog about, but I just haven't gotten around to doing it. This will be a random thoughts blog covering an array of items.

First, I'm glad I voted today. I waited until election day to vote because of my quandry over the candidates. I did not feel that either of the candidates were an adequate representation of any kind of change. I also was sick of all the political insanity that Christians were circulating. Kelvin Page at Westmore gave a great sermon on Sunday about Christians response after the election and the issue of authority. For some reason, this message inspired me and actually gave me a peace about voting. I have no expectations for how this election will wind up. Either way, I'm excited about the process and the way it has people dialoguing about our country and about the problems within the church. Isn't it funny how these two things keep coming up in conjunction with one another? I think it will be fun to watch it all play out, and I will be watching intently all night long.

Second, I have really been working on my thesis and my Apocalypse paper, as well as thinking about all the things we have talked about in Wholistic Mission. It is all rolling around in my head. I'm beginning to make some concrete formulations, which I hope to write about soon. I'm contemplating what the ENTIRE Bible has to say about the fatherless, orphan, widow, the poor and the immigrant. I'm also looking at what Revelation has to say about systems (economic, political, social constructs), and all of this in light of what the church is doing or hasn't done. I will throw you a bone though, I have said that Wesley had a system of radical discipleship, a call to social justice and life as an accountable and growing community. If we can't get following Wesley right, it might be a little much to think we can actually follow the mandates of Christ.

Third, I'm very excited to have been able to spend more time with my friend Angeline (and Mike too) at various points. I am thankful for their friendship and loving support during this time of transition in our lives. I would also like to say a big thank you to Emily Stone. Her efforts to include Belle and Ashton in activities have really helped my children to transition well.

Fourth, we have been enjoying various fall events. We painted pumpkins, we did pumpkin arts and crafts and enjoyed the night of tricks and treats. I will have pictures coming soon. We also have 2 pumpkins to carve, but considering that thanksgiving is upon us, we may just try to make a true from scratch pumpkin pie. Belle keeps asking to make one and the dried pumpkin seeds would make a great snack!

While this is not the exact maze, we also visited the corn maize in Anderson with Nana and Papi. As usual, it was a fun visit.

We have also been playing with chalk of late. I have some great photos of the kids that I hope to get up on the blog soon.

We have done so much work at my parent's new place. The transition has been amazing. I am so thankful that they are here.

Finally, I am really enjoying my internship. I'm actually starting to get attached to the people there. They have been extremely kind and gracious to me. I love the conversations we share and feeling like we are actually making a difference in the world. I could tell you stories of how things each one of them has said has impacted my life. Each of them have tremendous stories of God's grace and faithfulness in their life. I look forward to continuing to get to know them.

I guess that is all for now. I feel better that I've at written something here, even if it isn't as polished and perfected as I would like. I suppose blogging has now become important to me, and I don't want it to be as sporadic as in the past. I will do my best to get pictures up soon.

I look forward to the dialogue that future posts may bring. By the way, does anyone else feel hopeful about tonight's outcome no matter what it is? I just can't help thinking that no matter what happens, we are still His children, He still loves us and wants to see us all redeemed. Will the outcome of this election really change that? I think not. Que sera, sera.

Testing, Testing...1, 2, 3

2008-10-28T15:13:00.006-05:00

The mid-term is OVER, and boy am I glad. Aside from a cramping hand and issues with my pencil lead, it was quite a bit less painful than I expected. Don't misunderstand, the test was beyond hard (at least I gathered so from some of the looks and comments of some of my classmates). But, I'm certain that I passed. Time will tell the final grade (actually my professor will do the telling, but I assume that you're getting the point). I do wish that I had known all questions were weighted equally. That announcement was made before I came in the room. So, I wrote 4 pages for the first essay and was left with little time to answer the next 5. Needless to say, I didn't write as much as I could have.
Honestly, I am happier at the end of this test than I can ever remember being. As I mentioned in the previous blog, this time I wasn't just regurgitating information. I was talking about something that moved me. I suppose I should be thankful that there were questions that gave me the freedom to interject what I "know".
Now I am in the final countdown for the semester. I have one paper, a group project and of course, THE THESIS. How time flies. Isn't that what it is supposed to do when you are having fun?

What I Know...Or, in Most Cases Maybe What I Don't

2008-10-27T15:29:00.006-05:00

Tomorrow I will be taking my first mid-term "test" in almost 7 years. I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. I am beyond the cramming of the early years of college, because I respect myself and where my money is going more. But, at the same time the details of my life have gotten in the way of studying as if I would have wanted. (For instance, this morning I played in the floor with Ashton and his Diego toys for over an hour!)
So, for this mid-term, there may be a lot that I don't know (at least where the brain is concerned). I do know this though - as I have grown in my career as a student, I realize that if a person has enough determination, they can cram an enormous number of facts into their wee little brains. That is a testament to the pitfalls of the learning process. I have come to conclusion that learning is not about the facts I have stuffed away in my brain. It is an issue integration into the whole of my life and my world view. While making a "A" is probably still pretty high on my priority list, I am far more concerned with how the text is interpreting and changing me. (That is a definitive Rick Moore statement that cannot be said without proper credit being given.) There is an ebb and flow to the learning process and when you find your passion, it will all begin to converge. This is the place I am thankful to say that I have now reached. I am hesistant to say that what I have found is passion. More so, I believe I have had an awakening. Maybe I would not feel so inclined if my degree were another subject, but would venture to say that the people who are the best in their field have also reached the same conclusions.
Rather than being scared of my test tomorrow and the grade I may or may not receive, I am excited to see what I have really learned...to see what is inside of me.
So, here's to knowing the right things.

Thesis Inspiration

2008-10-23T00:12:00.005-05:00

If you are one of my professors, please don't hold this against me. He really was before his time and literally has "rocked" my world in more ways than one. I must admit, I wish the Church of God had a few Steve Taylors.

And, one for the road...does anyone else remember?

Ok, ok, just one more - Finally, the "post-modern" version of clone.

What am I doing? I'm supposed to be writing a thesis, right? And now, I can't stop. Save me from myself. Can I get an "Amen"?

I'm Angry....

2008-10-16T08:20:00.006-05:00

I'm sick of people twisting scripture for political gain. I'm also sick of people using scripture as a reason for backing one candidate or the other. What I am most sick of is people saying that scripture says things that it just doesn't say, which makes it a lie. And all the prophecy gurus using Revelation to prove your point should know better. Because while Revelation says nothing about the things you are saying it does, it does say that if you add or take away from the words of this book damnation will come to you. If I were you, I would think twice before you keep touting your crap. It also proves to me that Christians have become a group of gullible know nothings who just believe this crap because they think voting for a certain party makes them a better Christian...HOGWASH (to use a delicate southern term!).
I will be glad when this election is over. I have previously said on facebook and will repeat here...Obama is not Jesus, Palin is not Esther, McCain is not the Voice Crying in the Wilderness and none of them will save our country. As Christians, we should be smarter than this. The political system is broken, our church is broken and we are broken. We are not being the people of God. We are being a bunch of pinheads who expect the capitalistic system to fix our woes instead of looking to the one who can fix it and make His Kingdom come on this earth (have you forgotten that it is OUR job to help make His Kingdom evident in the earth?).
I could go on, but I am so angry, I can hardly bring myself together to write these words. I'm sorry if these words offend you, but
I'm ANGRY! Why aren't you?

Scooby, Scooby Doo...Where Are You?

2008-10-13T21:20:00.003-05:00

We have settled into a new nightly routine at our house. After evening playtime, dinner and bath time, we all pile into the living room for an evening snack and some Scooby Doo. It's funny how special it is that my kids love the same cartoons that I did when I was a kid. What is even funnier is that Boomerang is around making sure that they are still on TV.
Every day when the kids get home, they immediately start asking to watch Scooby Doo. Unlike the rest of you, we just got a DVR. Scooby Doo has now been put on series record. I promise we will never miss an episode.
The best part (other than just sitting and winding down with my kids)is to hear them sing the song. We will be riding along in the car and Ashton will randomly burst into song..."cooby, cooby doo wheh ah oo, we need uhr elp dis houahr". It is the most wonderful thing. It makes me smile and laugh. I heard today on CNN that laughter really is great medicine. It reduces cortisol in your body and helps you to burn fat. So, hey we can't go wrong there.
If I can ever find the cord to my video camera, I will try to catch "the boy" in action. You'll love hearing him sing as much as I do.

Owens Family Update

2008-10-08T07:54:00.007-05:00

We did it. We finally made the move to Cleveland at the end of July. We arrived in time to move in on August 1st. Things have been a whirlwind since then. Belle started school at Westwood Baptist on the 11th of August. She loved it! Even though she already knew all of her colors and shapes, she learned how to spell all of her colors. She made some great new friends and had two great teachers Mrs. Miller and Mrs. Morris. I say this all in past tense because Belle was offered the wonderful opportunity to go to school at "The Village". So, at the beginning of September Belle started school there. Once again, she loved it and still does! She has made new friends, but misses her other friends at Westwood and in Tallahassee. At night, Belle and I always talk about her day. I just listen. Every night I find out something new that I would not have known if we didn't just lie there and talk. Sometimes, I wish I could just freeze time.
On the 20th of August, I started school. Whew...to say that I am in over my head is probably the understatement of the year. I also started my internship early in September. So, between school and work at my internship, I am full time Monday through Thursday. The most difficult part has been being without the kids. When I was home full time, I always wanted to work. Now that am I gone from them, I just want to be with them. I have realized through this that there is a happy medium for me. I just keep reminding myself that I will have breaks soon and this is only for a year. I have the best kids ever! I have also been reading and writing a lot. I am just in the beginning stages of my thesis, but God is already shaking me to the core. At the beginning of the semester, our professors told us that our thesis wouldn't be great if it wasn't something that we were passionate about. Well, there is no lack of passion, and God keeps turning up the heat! I will talk more about my thesis and details of this in a later post.
As for Ashton...well, he is a champ! He is talking like a commentator. He is rarely ever at a loss for words. I am fascinated by the conversations that he and his sister have started to have together. For the month of August, I stayed with Ashton when I wasn't in school so that Brian could work on the job search and go to interviews. When I was in class, Ashton got to hang out with Dad. When I started my internship, Brian kept both kids full time Monday through Friday. What a champ. Needless to say, Brian and Ashton have built quite a bond. Ashton now asks for Dad when he needs comforting. I say that is awesome! In the middle of September, Ashton started school at Broad street Methodist. He has never complained about school, but we're not sure if he likes it as much as Belle. He does talk about the playground a lot. He has also started to name some of his friends. I wish you could hear him call their names. It's a hoot. His greeting when he is picked up is always, "I had a great day today!". He also loves to sing. He is singing his alphabet, twinkle, twinkle little star and itsy, bitsy spider. His favorite books are currently Barnyard Dance and The Lady With the Alligator Purse (he calls it "Miss Lucy had a Baby"). So for the most part, we are never at a loss for smiles and joy when it comes to Ashton.
Brian has been working hard with the kids and around the house. He suckered me into getting a dog. We now also have a rat terrier in our home. We call him Huck, but his official name is Huckleberry Sebastian Gaston Owens. What a mouth full. He is a good dog, but Brian and the kids take care of him. I really keep my hands off. After a long job search and some lengthy interviews, Brian officially started his new job. We are thankful, and Brian is very happy. Congratulations!
We have had some wonderful times in the mountains since we have been here. The weather has been terrific. We have taken the kids a couple of times to watch the rafters on the Ocoee River. We have been blessed to be able to spend time with very old and dear friends, who are now our new friends again. And, my parents moved to Cleveland just last week. They are now the official daytime caretakers for the Owens' kids. As you can guess, Belle and Ashton are not complaining.
We are all finally starting to settle in to our new routines, our new home and our new life here in Tennessee. A big thank you to the McMullin family, Skip Jenkins and "Aunt Gladys" for helping to make the transition as smooth as it could be. We love you all very much. Well, this has been a pretty long update. Hopefully, it won't be 4 months before my next post! ;)

Good-Bye Tallahassee

2008-06-24T22:02:00.004-05:00

For those of you who know (and now those of you who didn't know) we are about 1 month into our transition into a new life. At the end of May, we moved from Tallahassee. We have now been in Orlando for about 1 month. I thought the month would move slowly, but it has gone incredibly fast. July is almost here and I'm not quite sure where the time has gone. These are the last photos we took the day we left. The kids just had to run back and look in the bedroom windows.
The transition has been a little bit more difficult on Belle than I had imagined. She has missed her friends and wanted the stability of her own home, room and toys. So, we talk a lot about storage and our new house and dream of the new friends that we might get to live by. Ashton has been a ball of laughter. His laugh has been a saving grace. And, playing with my kids has taken on brand new joy.
Times like these inevitably make me realize and cherish what is truly important in life, and also help me to let go of those that I know are only temporary. I have once again come to a place of understanding that helping to carry someone else's burden eases your own.
I think overall I underestimated how difficult it would be to leave Tallahassee. But, I am thankful, hopeful and excited for all the wonderful things that are in store. I know it sounds like a cliche, but I believe that God's timing is perfect and that He knows exactly what He is doing. So, good-bye Tallahassee. Hello new life.

How Far We've Come...

2008-03-28T21:16:00.005-05:00

Tomorrow is our 5th anniversary. In some ways, it seems so short and in others, it seems like an eternity. I always explain our courtship (if you can call it that) and marriage like a roller coaster ride. For 30 years (give or take a few months for both of us), we were on the ride up the first hill. Our marriage was the peak of the first hill, and so far the rest has been a fast ride. We moved from Cleveland to Tallahassee when I was pregnant with our first child, Belle. Since then, Ashton came along, and aside from children, life has posed all sorts of trials and joys. If you are married with children, I'm sure that you understand what I'm talking about.
I could come up with a few profound things to say and maybe wow you with some words or poetic statements. But, instead, I just want to say Happy Anniversary to us! I am thankful for my husband. He is a hard-working man who loves Jesus and his family. Belle and Ashton adore him, and though he can frustrate me like no one else, I adore him too! Whether times are good or bad, it is comforting to know that someone is there with you and there to hold your hand. Thank God for good husbands who aren't totally self-consumed and think about others as much as they do themselves. They do exist, and I caught one. Wahooie!
Happy Anniversary, Brian. I love you. I am with you. I believe in you, even when you don't believe in yourself (and this works vice versa too!). Here is to the beginning. We are still in the beginning, and I look forward to the years to come with a hopeful and grateful heart.

New Drama - Here's the Cast...Literally

2008-03-17T22:17:00.015-05:00

So, my baby boy is in a cast for the next 4 weeks. As a mother, I'm heartbroken and probably in much more pain than he is. His leg is not broken. The bone is bent. A simple way of explaining the details is to say that the cast will make sure that it doesn't get broken and heals properly. For some reason, they think toddlers don't know how to stay still! ;)
Anyway, the tech who put on Ashton's cast said that from what he saw of his personality, the cast would not hold him back at all. One evening has proven that to be true. Within an hour of being home, he was up and running (as best he could) and climbing around as if nothing was wrong.

We are trying to make the best of it. The doctor explained it to him. We've always just talked to our kids as if they understood everything we were saying anyway. He has this new little "walker" to help him get around. It's basically a very wide velcro shoe that goes over his cast. We've told him this is his new sock and shoe for the next 4 weeks. He was fine with it until bedtime. Then Dad had to explain why this one doesn't come off.
Honestly, the most distressing part of this whole ordeal is that Ashton will miss his nightly bath. Every night in the middle of dinner Ashton begins his spiel about the "big, big, big bath tub". It is a nightly ritual that usually last 30 minutes or more. It is full of bubbles and boats, and just Saturday he got a new Leo and Rocket (from the Little Einsteins for those of you who are toddler challenged) bath tub toy. Needless to say, I'm sure we will be counting the nights until bath time can begin again. At least Brian won't be cleaning up poop! (Please see "Life is Messy" for the full details).
As part of the ritual, we took pictures. I have included most of them. Belle and I also took pictures of our "not in casts" feet. To which Belle concluded that we all have "not pretty" feet...except for her!
Let me close with an apology. This blog is certainly not in my usual style of writing. But, I've had a day. And, at this point, being coherent is just not an option.
If you are coherent, then say a prayer for my little man. We'll keep you posted!

No Creative Titles, Just Wanted to Say I'm Back

2008-03-11T22:13:00.002-05:00

So, it's been a 9 month hiatus. We'll I'm back. At least I hope to be. I've got a Friday study day and lots of things rumbling in this head and heart of mine. Besides, I have two kids, a husband, lots of school work, house work...you get the picture. Anyway, I've got time on my hands. So look for me. I've got some things to say about motherhood, Christianity (mine in particular), school and this great family I call my own. Hopefully, I have been gone, but not forgotten. See you in the funny papers! My Dad used to say that...never thought it was funny before tonight.

Jesus is for Losers

2007-06-07T20:43:00.000-05:00

Do you ever find yourself caught in this internal conflict of the haves and have nots of life. Come on, don't you ever sit in this pitty party of how "poor" you are compared this person or that person - thinking of all things you don't have, or could have or should have or "deserve"? I do. I think it's only natural human nature. Do you ever do things just because it's the right thing to do, but with anger or bad motives in your heart or to gain the respect of someone that you consider "important"? Be honest. I know that I have and sometimes still do. And so, in our attempts to "gain" respect, wealth, fame, appreciation or simply feel validated, we become something that ends up not looking very much like Christ at all. We spend so much time doing and getting that we forget to stop and ask the most important questions. Stop and ask yourself why you are doing the things you do.
The fact is that compared to most of the world, we are "rich". The fact is we are proud. The fact is we relish in this seeming control that we have over our lives. We are fascinated with Hollywood, with the rich, the famous and we forget our place. The fact is that we are all wretched, saved by the grace of an infinitely loving and merciful God. We get so caught up in the rat race of life (and even of ministry) that we forget where we came from and forget what it truly means to be Christian. He calls us to come just as we are.
I'm not asking you to sell all you have and give the money to the poor, although that's not a bad idea and Jesus did ask that of someone once. What I am asking you to do is stop wallowing. Be thankful for what you do have, which is more than most. I am asking you to reconsider what is a need and what is a want. I am asking you to find a person in need. I am asking to you to stop and ask yourself why you are doing the things that you do. Are you doing them to get rich or get a title or get some kind of acclaim? And I'm asking this of you, because I'm asking myself. And, I'm asking myself because I think scripture is clear that God asks it of all of us.
In Luke 4:14-21, Jesus begins His public ministry. He said, 18"THE SPIRIT OF THE LORD IS UPON ME, BECAUSE HE ANOINTED ME TO PREACH THE GOSPEL TO THE POOR. HE HAS SENT ME TO PROCLAIM RELEASE TO THE CAPTIVES, AND RECOVERY OF SIGHT TO THE BLIND,TO SET FREE THOSE WHO ARE OPPRESSED, 19 TO PROCLAIM THE FAVORABLE YEAR OF THE LORD." He is quoting Isaiah and talking about being the fulfillment of these words, and He has anointed us to do the same. In Psalms and Proverbs alone there are well over 250 verses talking about His justice and provision for the poor, the needy, the oppressed (if you want an exhaustive list, I'll give it to you).
So, stop and think. What is it time for you to give up? Do your motives need an overhaul? I know mine do all the time. I've read a lot of scripture this week. And, it has really challenged me and reminded me of where I came from and how very much I do have. Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me.
It's simple. Jesus is for losers.

The News of My Impending Death

2007-06-05T22:39:00.000-05:00

This is shout out to the women who sacrifice so much to make the lives of others so rich!

The news of my impending death came at a really bad time for me (thanks Steve for letting me borrow this great line!). I have a great husband and children who are practically perfect in every way. I have a church, which I love, and friends whom I adore. And, in some way, all of these people or things depend on me for something. So, you can see why this news might distress me. (Now before you start spreading rumors and calling the church to find out exactly what is wrong, please keep reading. I promise I'll give you all the details!)

What is the first thing you do when you realize you're dying (as if you haven't heard the song)? You think of all things you want to do. You want to reclaim the Joie de Vivre (Joys of Life). You reevaluate what is most important. You get ready to meet your maker.

For those of you who don't know, I am currently in Cleveland, TN. I am away from my home, my husband and my children. For the first time in over 3 years, I am spending some serious alone time. And, unlike my husband who has come to dislike his alone time, I am LOVING EVERY MINUTE OF IT! In the past three+ years of my life, I have not spent more than 6 to 8 alone. As women, this is not an uncommon thing. We have priorities, responsibilities. But, we also have a responsibility to ourselves. This, you see, is why the news of my impending death was so unnerving.

We all need time to be alone, to reflect, to recharge, to think, to play, to laugh, to listen to the music we like, to watch the tv shows we want to watch, to jump on the bed, to sing into your hairbrush while watching yourself in the mirror {not that I'm doing these things...I'm just giving examples ;)}, to BREATHE, to reconnect with old friends, to make new friends, to find new definition for our lives.

IT IS SINFUL to neglect ourselves, our own mental and spiritual well-being the way that we do - or at least the way that I do. And, the fact is that we do it with such great intentions and because there is such great need. But, we do it to our own detriment and to the detriment of those around us.

I know, I know...the death thing. That is why I'm in Cleveland. Both Brian and I realized that I was dying inside. I was losing the essential elements that made me the woman I am today. I needed to find them and me. And, you need to take time to do the same. If you neglect yourself, you will find that you are in the same position. The honest truth is that just like me, you will start not to like yourself, and when this happens, you will wonder how others can like you. When you come to the realization, you will be mad at yourself for losing those precious parts of you that made you unique and lovable. Then, you will be angry at others for not calling you on it and challenging you to come out of it. Then you just end up bitter, depressed and lonely and that sucks. Who wants to live that way? I certainly don't! So, I guess that's my job today - to challenge you to move. I'm not saying that you have to go 7 hours away and spend 5 days by yourself. But, you should probably take a day or two, or even a weekend and get away by yourself or with your girlfriends and reflect on who you were, who you are and who you want to be and are called to be.

I am not hard wired to be confined within the four walls of my house. Nor am I hard wired to only talk about the "wifely" and "motherly" duties I perform. And, the fact is, I don't think that most of you are either. I want to go and do and learn and laugh and love and find beauty, joy and ordinary things to be thankful for everyday. LISTEN TO WHAT I AM SAYING. God has called me and God has called you and He has called us to perform acts of service in His kingdom. And, we as women must take time alone for ourselves to find out exactly what that is! Don't get lost out there. Don't lose yourself. Ask for help. I did.

It's like I was a person who was living but without enough oxygen. For me, this trip is like being hooked up to oxygen tank. I feel rejuvenated, full of life, even giddy. I was talking to Brian today and kept asking me, "Are you giggling? Why are you giggling?". I just kept saying, "I don't know. I guess I just thought it was funny." Proverbs 17:22 says, "A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones."

Lord, I'm thirsty - we're thirsty. Take me (us) to the waterfall. Ask the Lord to give you a holy vision of your mission that plays like a DVD in your head over and over. I am. I am reclaiming who I am. Find out who you are again.

I'd hate to hear of the news of your impending death...

Jesus Take the Wheel

2007-04-18T10:26:00.000-05:00

I constantly have ideas rambling through my head that I would love to blog about. Rarely do I actually make the time to sit down and write. I suppose this is some type of flaw in my nature or rather just a way of prioritizing that reflects where my life is currently.
Anyway, I'm reading a lot of books right now...Blue Like Jazz, Velvet Elvis, Battlefield of the Mind, Get out of that Pit. Let me just say, while I enjoy listening to Joyce Meyers now and then, I am really having trouble reading her book. It's not that her conclusions are necessarily wrong, but her means of getting to them is utterly annoying. They follow no pattern of legitimate study, but random cross referencing of different versions (interpretations) of the Bible. Maybe I'm being an academic snob. I'm trying not to be. At least I haven't given up reading it all together. Blue Like Jazz is great reading. So far, I'm a big fan of his writing style. I'm only a chapter into Velvet Elvis. I have yet to make any conclusions. Although, my first observation is his poignant use of analogy.
Ok. So, other than that, I've discovered an amazing thing about God's grace. Well, I say God's grace. Let me explain. Just when you think things can't get any worse, the sinking ship gets another hole (how's that for analogy). So, I'm not sure if it's God's grace, denial or an acceptance that this is life and who wants to live life unhappy or feeling like it's always a struggle. That is why I use the analogy of the sinking ship with another hole. When the ship is going under anyway, does one more hole really matter all that much or make the ship sink any faster. Personally, I think not. It may be delirium, but I choose to think that this hole is allowing the water that's in the boat to seep out, thus making the ship sink less quickly. A-HA! It is my hope that the dreary posts of the beginning of this year will be replaced with much lighter and enjoyable observations about life. This is life. I think I agree with anyone who says that life is 90% attitude and 10% what happens to you. Life isn't changing much around here. I'm not sure that life does...Solomon was wise, he didn't seem to think it changed much at all. I think life changes when we see it differently. We are all in this together. We are all messed up in some way. We all go through crap. You can't really compare crap...it all stinks. Sometimes the smallest crap stinks the worst. Sometimes it all comes down to perspective. You can only do so much, and then you have to raise your hands and say Jesus take the wheel. Maybe that's what age and wisdom do for youthful zeal...they calm and steady us so that we realize what is important in life. If we could only find that perfect balance.
My friend Loyd just wrote an awesome blog about how it's not so much about our methods but our obedience. I think the lessons I'm learning now are really clicking with that sentiment. This is part of success...contentment ~ lesson one for those of you who have followed. Do what your hands are given to do with all of your might, whatever that may be...like it or not.
I'm happy - almost deliriously happy. Grace, acceptance, attitude, determination, delirium...call it what you will. At least it's not the pit of despair.

Still cleaning up the crap, but doing it with a smile!

Simply Amazing

2007-03-03T21:44:00.000-05:00

Tonight I was lucky enough to be able to go on a date with my husband. As usual, I was left with the decision of what movie to see. I chose "Amazing Grace", the story of William Wilberforce and the abolition of the slave trade. I really wanted to see this movie on the big screen, and let me just say that I am so very glad that I did! I don't remember the last time that I have seen a movie that was so moving and inspiring. So, before I continue, let me just say that if you haven't seen it, you need to see it. If you have no plans to see it, rearrange your plans...NOW.
I must admit that my own current life situation has greatly affected how I saw the movie and now how I am responding to this movie. The writers, directors and actors did an amazing job of showing how Wilberforce's destiny was never completely in his own hands. It was an awesome thing to see how God used others to propel him towards his destiny from the time he was boy, through college, through his early years in government and ultimately to his marriage and the passing of the bill to abolish the slave trade. In light of this, I must say that while I left this movie personally inspired about the destiny that God has for me, I was also deeply moved by Wilberforce's wife.

I consider myself to still be quite new at this wifey thing. That's probably because I am. But, when you add children into the mix, there is a whole different set of things to be concerned with and about. Lately though, my heart's cry has been to learn how to be a better wife, to learn how to support, uplift, pray for and truly partner with my husband. I know that the movie shows a shallow portrait of what their life was together, but she was truly one of the inspiring forces that moved Wilberforce along towards the destiny that God had designed for him. In this new age of women's liberation and equality, it sometimes feels to me to be such a fine line that I walk between this strength and this "submission" that God's word speaks about. My prayers have centered so much around understanding the balance that Wilberforce's wife seemed to possess. Granted, I do realize that this was only a movie. But, it seems to me that there was so much more there.

On another note, it led me to the thoughts of how intertwined our destinies are. Wilberforce was the voice for nation, but was his wife's voice any less just because it was not the vocal piece that was seen. It was obvious to me that without Newton, Pitt, Barbara (his wife), he would not have succeeded. But, oh how hard it can be to be the one in the background (and is it truly the background or is that just how our views have evolved ~ or become warped might be a better use of terms). Some people don't have a problem with this. In fact, it seems to be natural for them, almost to the point of seeming like oppression. Needless to say, I think every day things are happening in my life that are leading me to ask some not so easy questions with not so easy or comfortable answers.
But, I recently read someone who said this, "one aspect about growth is that it is often painful. That pain can also lead to many questions such as, "Lord, is this really You?", "What did I do wrong?", "What are You trying to tell me?", and "What will happen if I stop?" Sometimes, the thing to do is to press past the questions (as opposed to insisting that they be answered prior to taking another step), do the thing at hand, and trust that every question will be answered in the right time." This phrase has helped me more than anything else I've heard/read in a long time. Sometimes I think we spend so much time looking for the answers that we forget what we are supposed to be doing. In turn, we stunt our growth and become haunted by the things we didn't do. My point, I think it is just this that differentiates those who fulfill their detiny from those lie dormant. Wilberforce is the perfect example of one who pushed past the questions to achieve that God-given destiny. I too want to be that person, and I want to accept that destiny in the form that it comes, whether it be the mouth piece or the inspiration behind it. If the movie is true to his memoir, then Wilberforce is also proof that great people don't sleep. There is something to be said for making the most of the time we are given.
Amazing Grace is full of terrific one liners and sermon topics. With all the good stuff inside, I could possibly take up preaching. I wouldn't run out of material for a while. The movie was also proof that an annointed song crosses the boundaries of time, music genres, etc. Hearing that song throughout the movie was so powerful. Every time it played I got chills. Of course, maybe there is still just enough tradition in me to appreciate it so much. I tend to believe the former to be more true. It was a statement of what true greatness is about. And, of course, the underlying themes that I have expounded on above. I'm no movie critic, but I think this is one of those timeless movies that is somehow able to speak to each person where they are currently and will continue to speak to generations to come.
So, if you're on the Dave Ramsey plan, pull out your entertainment money, break open the piggy bank...heck, bust open the emergency fund if you must...this is one movie you just don't need to miss!

Frame Not Broken, Cover ~ It's Destroyed

2007-03-02T09:16:00.000-05:00

If you have been to our house, you know how much we love our deck and gazebo. Today, the cover to the gazebo is no more. I'm going to try and call the company to see if we can get a new one. The frame and mosquito netting seem to be no worse for the wear. I know that we are very lucky. 13 people in Alabama are dead. We are alive. Besides, we can always get another gazebo.

It's amazing what the gazebo has withstood. It is over two years old. We have had bad thunderstorms, high winds, tornadoes and even hurricanes before. I guess this time, it had just had enough. It needed to show that though it is tough on the inside, the outside couldn't hide what it's been through any more. I know it's just a gazebo. But, haven't we all felt that way ourselves sometimes. The awesome thing is that the frame is strong and is still standing ~ good as new.

I tried to convince myself not to make any comparisons and just tell the story for what it is, but I have already failed. So for those of you whose minds don't work this way, just stop reading or bear with me. This is just me. It's the way my mind works. It doesn't mean I'm too serious or don't have a fun side. It just means that while I accept things for what they are, it is always neat to see how they relate to other things in life. Whew...glad I got that off my chest!

Anyway, if you are feeling tattered and torn (basically shredded to pieces), maybe it's time for you to get a new cover. The framework is still strong and the same. You just need to take on something new so that people appreciate your strength and don't think that you are falling apart just because your cover is worn.
That said, I'm very sad for the people in other places who are mourning their losses this morning. I'm thankful that all I lost was the cover to my gazebo. The worst case scenario ~ I lose my gazebo, and we have to play in the sun. Hopefully, I'll be able to get a new cover. If not, maybe we can save up for a new one. If your cover is destroyed, let's hope your framework is not!

Defining Success

2007-02-27T08:30:00.000-05:00

So, I have been thinking a lot about this idea lately. I'm 33, and I'm not sure that I have ever defined this for myself. I think this was brought on by two things. At Christmas, someone told me that they thought that I didn't know what I wanted. Second, a couple of weeks ago, I heard a man say that when he was asked to give his definition of success, his response was simply "peace". Also, I've had this strange revelation of late regarding people who are "strange" or any word you could use to describe someone who walks to a different beat so to speak. What I find is that these people have a tendency to be happy. I think that they are at peace with themselves. That is saying more than I can for a lot of people that I know.

WHAT IS YOUR DEFINITION OF SUCCESS? HAVE YOU SUCCEEDED IN REACHING YOUR SUCCESS?

I'm still working this out. I will get back to you with an answer, but I'd like to know what you think. I do know this. I don't buy into all this mumbo jumbo about planning your life to death. I do realize that without a vision the people perish, but I think there is more to it than just planning your life out on paper. I think that takes something away from the other scripture about walking by faith. More often than not, our plans just fail or we spend our time working toward a goal, yet always falling short (though not failing) and always feeling like we just don't cut it (and coming up unhappy in the end).

All of these thoughts have been brought on by a statement that has captured me - "Are you working toward what God has for you to do or are you striving?" Are the things that we are doing really what we are called to work at or is it just a good idea that will leave us striving? Right now I don't have an answer. I just know that I need some change in my life and some answers.

So, you can help me in this process. Answer my questions, dialouge with me, be the body of Christ with me, challenge me (yes, I really did ask for it!). A friend of mine gave up being negative for lent. I think I want to give it up forever. For more details read my previous blog "My Knee is Broken" if you need to get caught up. Ok, well it's off to the routine. For once though, I had to write. There was no excuse good enough to put this off. I look forward to your responses.

My Body is a Masterpiece

2007-02-23T16:15:00.000-05:00

A little over a week ago, I was working on support letters for the people at church who are taking missions trips this summer. I had put Belle down for her nap about 30 minutes earlier. Normally, she drifts off to sleep. It's like a picture perfect story from the tale "Night Before Christmas". I'm thinking that visions of sugar plums are dancing in her head (more like visions of Ariel, Aurora and Belle), when what to my wondering eyes should appear but a naked little girl full of great cheer. She was colored with marker from head to toe - mustache around her lips, dots on her nose. But that is not the end of this tale you see, she had colored her feet, her bum and her boobies. So much composure I tried to retain, but alas I could not - laughter and tears fell like rain. I put up the markers and chastised her well, put her back to bed and all was well. She drifted off to sleep, my laughter remained and one day she'll read this story with disdain. Why do you ask? I'll tell you why. These are great stories to tell all the guys!

PS - This photo is another one of her coloring days. It's obvious...she loves lipstick.

Making a Shift

2007-02-18T23:47:00.000-05:00

MySpace...

Well, I have decided to transition my blog from MySpace to a "real" blog site. I have moved my original postings, and they are all dated February 16th, regardless of when I originally wrote them.
I'm trying to be more tech savvy. I'm not sure that will ever really happen. And, I envy my friend Nic who is reading 12 books all at once. I have a hard time reading one. I'd like to blame it on a certain infant and toddler that I know, but it is more likely that I just haven't decided to make the time. Something always seems to need cleaning, folded, washed, etc.
None the less, I find blogging (and reading other's blogs) to be somewhat cathartic. Someone described it as eating a cheeseburger with a friend, minus all the fat and calories. So, maybe you'll get to know me better. Maybe I'll get to know you better. Maybe we'll just keep up on one another's lives. I don't really know. I do know that when I write, I feel better. For now, that is my goal...a new writing habit. Not such a bad goal...there are worse things in life, right?

My Knee is Broken (A.K.A. - Anonymous Confessions of My Lunatic Friend)

2007-02-16T17:14:00.002-05:00

So, what is a woman to do when she is supposed to sleeping, but she just can't. I'm supposed to be sharing a room with my daughter tonight so that I won't be awakened by my "still not sleeping through the night at 8 months" son. At this point, I'm really hoping that I don't get scolded for being up so late when I'm supposed to be "resting". But you see, this is the problem...

I'm in Orlando. It's the holiday. I had pumpkin pie and Starbucks for dinner. My son has been asleep since 8pm (barring a few waking incidents due to noisy neighbors shooting off 250 ft. rolls of lady fingers and God himself only knows how many bottle rockets). My brother, being the gentleman that he is, brought me popcorn and a Dr.Pepper. I couldn't bring myself to eat the popcorn, but I couldn't refuse the Dr. Pepper. His thoughtfulness was too sweet, and since Brian isn't here, I thought it best to drink one in his honor this New Years eve.

As if the caffeine were not enough to keep me awake, shortly after midnight my daughter is somehow awake and screaming at the top of her lungs. When I finally get to the room, she is standing in the pack'n'play. I asked her what was wrong. She replies through her sobbing and tears, "Mommy, my knee is broken." I quickly reply, "Do you want me to get you a hot towel?" "Yes Mommy." "Grandma is the best at making hot towels. I will have her to get you one." The screaming continues, despite all my efforts to console her, until the hot towel arrives. Two seconds later, all is well, and she is practically asleep before I can even ask if she feels better. And suddenly, my mind is somewhere 25 years ago reminiscing about all the hot towels I had to have to ease the growing pains in my own legs.

Of course, then I have to recall the years that follow ~ along with all their joys, triumphs, sorrows, pains...you get the point. I suppose that a New Year is the perfect time to look back at what was, remember the good and do our best to forget the bad.

Seeing that I'm starting to get older (notice I did not say "old"!), I realize that I forget a lot of the details of life, and the intensity of some of the things I felt isn't so strong anymore. In light of that, I must admit that it seems to me that 2006 was one of the hardest years I ever remember having (if not the hardest). As I continue to try to work through it all in my mind, I find myself mostly wanting to just forget - forgive and forget.

In my awake state, I thought tonight would be a great time to update my profile song on MySpace. In looking, I came across the song "Love Takes Time". I can't get it off of my mind. It goes something like this...(please, just humor me and read it!)

Have you ever been lied to, maybe mistreated.
Taken for granted till you just can't stand it.
Were you ever mistaken, thought to be someone
That you just can't be, with the love you need
Love takes time, please be kind, see every part of me
Love's not blind, ties that bind, take on eternity
Would you like to be trusted, for once in your life.
Carry that fire, without burnin' each other
Are you easily angry, can you bury your pride
Could you ever forgive me, and not keep it inside
Make a sacrifice sometimes, maybe more than you planned
I know we don't like the pain it takes to make a stand
A hard heart or a heartache, to admit that you're wrong
Though it's hard, it hardly matters if that love is strong
Make a sacrifice sometimes...
I think this song might possibly encompass all the emotion I have felt this year. So, for now, it is my theme song for the New Year. I think it truly encompasses so much more than a New Years resolution. It is a reckoning to be the Christ follower that He has called me to be.

So, follow the lyrics along with me...

I will forgive and do my darndest to forget.

I will no longer mistake myself for someone I am not, even if others do. (If you find my lunatic friend, please be nice!)

I will do my best to be kind, and try to do the same justice for others that I am doing for myself...I will do my best not to mistake them for someone that they are not.

I consider myself (and I know others that do as well) to be very trustworthy. I want to take that to the next level.

The fire part...I'll come back to that!

I don't want to be angry anymore.

I want to bury my pride (for a lot of reasons).

I want to give and receive true forgiveness.

I want to rid myself of the hard heart and heartache I feel I have had in 2006.

Mark this one down! I can willingly admit that in 2006 I have been wrong. When I am wrong, I'll try to keep this admitting thing going this year.

He gave the ultimate sacrifice, it's time I gave mine completely as well. It is so easy to just give bits and pieces, especially in our American pop culture...but that is another blog all together.

(Now, back to the fire part) More than anything this year, I want to carry the fire without burning someone else. And, in selfishness, I'd kind of like a break on being burned.

I guess this is a pretty tall order. There are no guarantees, just a promise that I hear ringing in my head in Belle's sweet voice..."With God, all things are possible". Hearing a two year old quote scripture ought to be enough to bring anyone to tears!

Again, these aren't New Years Resolutions. They are things I have pondered in my heart for quite some time now. Those closest to me know just how much.

This phrase has often gotten on my nerves, but somehow tonight it seems appropriate - Daddy God, my knee is broken...(a.k.a. - I still have growing pains and need a hot towel to make it better).

I should be sleeping. Can you see why I'm not?

Woman With an Issue

2007-02-16T17:14:00.001-05:00

It seems that we all have issues. The worst kind are the ones you think you've cancelled, but they just keep showing up on your doorstep with a cover saying "renew now or this will be your final issue". The only problem is that it never seems to be the final issue. Does anyone know what I'm talking about?
Well, there was a woman in the Bible with a different kind of issue. She bled constantly for years. In that time, there was no reprieve. In fact, she couldn't love her husband, sleep in her own bed, pack her kids lunches, hug them & send them off to school. No, she had to live outside the city walls in a box and cry "unclean, unclean". How depressing! The gospel of Mark (chapter 5) tells us that she spent all the money she had on doctors, but only became worse. She had no hope of becoming better. But, she had faith. She said if she could only touch Jesus garment, she would be well.
Jesus and his disciples were on their way to a rich rulers house when the woman came from behind and clutched his garment and kept on clutching it. Jesus knew that someone had touched him and asked who it was. When the woman replied, he told her that her faith had made her whole. The glory of Christ was revealed. And, while her healing was a great miracle, the greatest miracle was that her pain resulted in helping the multitudes recognized who Christ really was.
You've heard the story; now listen. We all have issues. Your issue may or may not be medical. It might be something that you feel like you have wrestled with for years. Have you have spent all your time, energy and maybe even money (going to counselors, maybe?!) trying to rid yourself of your issue? It might be that you need to just have the faith to reach out and touch the risen Christ. Or, have you ever stopped to think that maybe, just maybe what you are wrestling with is exactly what God intended in order to reveal Christ to others? Remember, legitimate healing comes not so much in believing or having faith that you will be healed, but in believing in the risen Christ, the healer, who died so that you might be whole.
You see, unlike us, God has the ability to see and know what is best for each of his children all at the same time. What may seem a painful and unending issue for you and me, may be the one thing that in the end will set someone else free. What may not seem "fair" to us is actually the father's loving hand hard at work.
God is not finite like we are. He has tomorrow's answers before you've even thought of tomorrow's questions.
So, chew on that for a while.

Wrestling With God

2007-02-16T17:13:00.001-05:00

That is what I feel my life has been consumed with of late. From what I can see, there are two kinds of wrestling with God. The first is the kind of wrestling we do when we don't want to give in to the direction or plan that God has for our life. The second is the kind of wrestling that Jacob did in Genesis 32. The second is what I want to talk about tonight.
For those of you who don't know the story or need a refresher course, Jacob was preparing to meet his brother Esau (whom he had robbed of his rights as firstborn). He was afraid and had sent his servants ahead with offerings to try and soften him up. Night had come. Jacob sent his wives, maids and children on ahead of him. Jacob was alone. He wrestled with God all night. As dawn came near, God dislocated Jacob's thigh. He told Jacob to let him go, but he said that he would not let go until God blessed him. It was this night that Jacob was given the name Israel (meaning "he struggles with God") and became the father of the great nation into which Christ was born.
The outward wrestling was a sign of the inward struggle within Jacob. How I have wished of late for my wrestling to have some type of physical mode, instead of being trapped inside. Come on, haven't you ever wanted to punch a wall or throw something or even hit someone because you thought it would make you feel better. I have. Of course, Jacob limped away with a permanent physical reminder of his great wrestling match. But, he also walked away with his blessing. God found Jacob out, and in our wrestlings (whether physical or internal), he finds us out too!
This wrestling is a sort of divine discontent that is pulling us, drawing us to give up certain things, to change certains ways that we are and operate even though it may cost us everything, even our lives. God wrestles in us to accomplish His will and purpose.
What we must be sure of is that we are wrestling for the right purpose. Right now, I'm not certain if I'm wrestling for the right reasons. But, I do know this...God is working on me none the less because I'm recognizing so many things about myself that I'm not sure I would have been ready to face before. Part of this relates to my previous blog about friends who wound us. In being reminded of who I am, I have also realized the parts of me that I have lost that I should not have lost. So, now I am left to find them.
If you are wrestling tonight, I challenge you to ask yourself why. Are you wrestling with God because you are bucking against His will for your life? Or, are you wrestling because God is moving you to a new place in Him? And, perhaps in the midst of wrestling for the wrong reasons, you can change your course and wrestle for the right ones.
Matthew 5:8 says, "Blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God". Jacob said that he had seen God, and his life was preserved. May we be pure in heart. May we see God. May we wrestle for all the right reasons. And in the end, may we be changed to be more like Him. After all, isn't that the goal?!

Some People Just Don't Get It

2007-02-16T17:12:00.002-05:00

Or me either for that matter. Have you ever felt that way? Sometimes, I feel that way more often than not. But, I thank God for the people that do get "it" and me! If you are a Christian, you might have heard it termed "kindred spirit" or something to that effect. Regardless, these are people that somehow we are just able to connect with and share life with (and the harsh realities that often come with it!).
That is why the community of faith is so important. When we go through hard times (or even easy times), it can become easy or comfortable to isolate ourselves, tell half truths or only reveal part of ourselves because we don't want to disclose the reality of our lives. The older I get, the more I realize how difficult it is to make true friends. That is why I am so thankful for my old standbys. These are the friends who have gone throught "the fire" with me, if you know what I mean. And, I am doubly thankful for the people I have met in recent years who are becoming my friends. I am closer to some than others, but know that there is plenty of fire around to help strengthen the new ones.
Friendship is not a passing fad. True friendship is hard to come by. It takes work and vulnerability on both sides of the fence. True friendship can never occur if only one person is willing. So, work hard at the things that are important. For instance, MySpace has been a great place to reconnect with a lot of acquaintances. But, the truth is, I never needed MySpace to keep up with those people who were truly my friends. (I must admit that I love being able to see my friends day to day lives on a more regular basis, instead of just thumbing through photos when we are together or using my imagination in long phone conversations.)
The nice thing about true friends is that they see beyond the surface. They hear past words to hear what you are really saying. They read what you write, but know the intent of your heart. They sense even when we are silent. And, true friends hold you accountable. They share their sorrows and their joys.
I have had two precious conversations with two of my best friends recently. During one conversation, I cried. I didn't cry out of sadness, but because someone "got me". They knew what made me tick, made me angry, made me smile and were able to listen and know my heart. The second was quick. We simply shared in the joy of God's blessing in her life. You see, that's the thing. With true friends, you share the junk and joy. And, if you share the junk, you must share the joy!
Sometimes in the hustle of life, it becomes easy to lose who you are. I am convinced that most discontent in our lives does not come out of our life situation, but in that we have allowed our life situations to alter who we are at the core. We trade grace for judgement. We trade joy for anger. We trade the true love of Christ for bitterness. We lose who we are and that is where the frustration with life comes from. True friends remind us of who we are and challenge us not to bargain with who we are. Proverbs 27:6 says, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend." Sounds funny, right?. If you read verse 5, it tells us that an open rebuke is better than love concealed. So, it goes to say that sometimes it hurts when friends are honest, but in the end it is for the best.
In our society, we tend to expect/want the quick and easy. Nothing worth having is ever quick or easy or free. True friendship has a price. True friendship requires an infinite amount of work. And, when you grow up and move away, it can get expensive (long distance phone calls, packages, visits across country). True friendship is worth every dime, every sacrifice and more.
To my dear friends (and you know who you are), thank you. I know that you know how much I love you. Thank you for holding me accountable. Thank you for reminding me what is important in life. Thank you for reminding me who I am at my core. Thank you for reminding of dreams that sometimes seem long gone. Thank you for telling me not to eat that second roll. Thank you for "getting it" and me.
To my new and up-and-coming friends, thank you for taking a chance. I truly hope that one day we will have all that I have mentioned above. I hope one day we have stories to reminisce over. I hope we will have journey, chicken salad and dr. thunder to make us smile (if you even remotely understood that, you are well on your way to getting to know me!).
Some people just don't get it...Do you?

I Miss My Kid!

2007-02-16T17:12:00.001-05:00

I wanted to think of some witty, creative title to catch your attention. But, alas, no title seemed right except the one I chose. I want to shout it from the rooftops! It is funny the way God equips us to love our children.
Things have been really busy and stressful lately. During times like these, for most of us, our children bring a joy and welcomed relief to the heaviness of day to day living. So, being without them takes away a little of the sunshine. I'm convinced that God intended it that way. It sort of turns the tables a little and makes us dependent on those little bits who can do relatively little without our assistance. I'm also certain of this one thing...that I am missing her so much more than she is missing me. Still, I look forward to the weekend when I will see her smiling face and flopping piggy tales. And, hopefully, she will come running to me while shouting "Mommy, Mommy".
If you have no kids, maybe your dog licking you brings you similar joy. I wouldn't know. I've never had a pet. I do know one thing...I MISS MY KID!

Logan's, Logan's, Logan's

2007-02-16T17:11:00.001-05:00

How many Logan's rolls can I eat before it is sin? They are sooo yummy when they come out of the oven, not quite brown with all of that artery clogging gold on top.

Does anyone else have this problem? I mean really, do I have to stop eating them? I actually think that looking at them puts on the pounds. Of course, any one of us could have this problem with any number of things...other foods, tv, MySpace (come on...don't kid yourself, you know it's true!). Moderation in all things - that is the motto of the day.
So, do you have an answer yet? I do. I think I have sinned before I ever even start to eat them. I know that I can't eat just one, and the yeast that makes them rise, makes me rise as well (thank you Mom for that observation - see, I still listen to you!). It's not that the roll itself is so terribly bad to have every now and then. It's the fact that I lose all sense of self control when it comes to those stupid rolls.
So, enough of the nonsense. I hope that I'm not the only one loving Logan's rolls. Here's to self-control, moderation, and OH...just one more Logan's roll.

Mushy Mommy Stuff

2007-02-16T17:10:00.001-05:00

Today I took my daughter to Hollywood and Vine's Play'N'Dine with some of the characters from Playhouse Disney. We were there to eat breakfast. In fact, we were paying to eat breakfast. But, who cares about breakfast when June, Leo, JoJo and Goliath are around, right? Certainly not Belle, and certainly not her Mommy. She was entranced. I was enamored with her fascination. Even Ashton was giggling and smiling after he woke up. He knew something fun was happening.
So, my question today is this. How many times do we let the sweetest moments of life pass us by? What is really important? Even as little as she is, Belle knew that eating was irrelevant. We were there to hang out with June, and hang out with June we did (check out my new slide show for all the fun!). We followed her around the restaurant ~ dancing with her, hugging her, just touching her dress every chance we could. We must have blown her a hundred kisses. And the dancing...we danced to all the Playhouse Disney songs.
I'm not trying to be super spiritual here or pull something out of the air. But, I want Belle to love God this way. For that matter, I want to love God that way. Don't you? My friend says on her page, "I love God, poorly, but I do". I feel that way so many times.
We would all do well to watch the intriguing ways of a child. Belle took it all in. I couldn't take enough pictures or video. I thought I couldn't care less about the characters, but I did because Belle did. I was happy because she was happy. In that moment I couldn't have cared less about any want or desire of my own. People are always watching. I can't count how many waiters, waitresses and other actors in the show came to talk to her and check her out. It was contagious!
So now, you can take this as you want. You can enjoy the fun and the story. You can be spiritual and make some application if you dare. All I know is that I learn more from my daughter sometimes than she is learning from me.
Don't be jaded. Don't be so set in your ways. Don't lose the wonder of childhood. Don't eat so much. Don't starve. Smell the roses. Don't be so worried about housework and spend time cherishing moments with those you love (this is not an excuse to not clean the toilet ~ just remember there is a time and place for everything!). Don't spend your days pining away for what is not or ever will be.
Call an old friend. Be nice to the cashier at Wal-Mart. Take a chance and actually enjoy living for once. Be you. Love God, poorly if you have to, but love Him. And, if you ever need a lesson in any of the above, you can come hang out with Belle!

Coming Up for Air

2007-02-16T17:09:00.002-05:00

Tonight as I stood along the back wall listening to PB talking about contending for the faith, I kept thinking about people feeling overwhelmed with life (even the good parts), those overwhelmed with fighting the good fight (2 Tim. 4:7). The thought of coming up for air, the "just breathe" concept kept churning inside me. Even wonderful things (like moving to a new building) can seem almost too much sometimes.
The ability to breathe under water is not natural. Eventually, we all have to come up for air unless we have some type of device helping us to breathe. When life gets busy and overwhelming or there is some crisis affecting us, we tend to tell ourselves "Just Breathe". Anna Nalick has written an entire song about it (Just Breathe - 2am). All kinds of doctors and counselors tell people to just breathe or to take a deep breath to calm them down. But, maybe, just maybe, to "just breathe" is only the world's solution. In fact, in my recollection and reading of God's word I can't remember a time that the solution was for us to take a breath.
As we were preparing for water baptism and actually baptizing I was taken back to a moment in my past. Have you ever heard someone breathe their last breath? I have. It is a paralyzing moment to say the least. It is like the deep inhale you make when the doctor checks your lungs, except there is never an exhale. While watching a friend of mine (who happened to be former drug addict and achoholic) be baptized, the most amazing thing occured. As he was dunked into the water, the death rattle rang clearly from his lungs. When he came up out of the water, he breathed as if God himself had just piped air into his lungs. It was an amazing and terrifying moment. The presence of the Lord was obvious, and it seemed if almost everyone in the congregation began to weep. It was as if the person he was literally died as went under the water. And, the person who rose up out of the water was a brand new creature. In Christ that is how it should be.
Water baptism is an outward sign of an inward commitment made to Christ. It a symbol of the death of the old and a rising up of the new. Therefore, PB's message was all the more fitting. Part of contending for the faith is dying. When the situation (whether good or bad) seems too much, rather than breathing, we should probably ask ourselves how good of a job we have been doing at dying. Just read Romans 6 (there are a lot more NT references to this, but this particular chapter is very comprehensive). The writer of Corinthians tells us that he dies daily (1 Cor. 15.31).
So, my point -
maybe we shouldn't be coming up for air, but constantly remembering our baptism day. We should be taking that daily dunk where we breathe our last and come up having our lungs filled with the breath of Christ Himself who died that we might live.

Oh Praise the One who Payed my Debt and Raised This Life up From the Dead.
Jesus Paid it All.

So This is Love...

2007-02-16T17:09:00.001-05:00

I was going to begin blogging with something grand and theological, but the events of the day have brought me to a different place. If you don't recognize the title, it is from Disney's Cinderella. Cinderella sings the song as she dances with the prince. My daughter is completely enchanted with the princesses right now, especially Ariel and Cinderella. So, if you don't know me very well, I'll let you in on a secret - this blog is about my dear children.
This afternoon my daughter says that she wants to snuggle with Mommy (what a pleasant surprise) and watch Little Einsteins (no surprise there!). So, with one child nursing and a little cutie tucked in the other arm, we watch Little Einsteins. It was a delirious moment filled with joy that only another parent could really ever understand, and one that I never want to forget. For those of you who aren't parents, please indulge me a little.
As I relish in the joy that my daughter is actually sitting still long enough to let me love on her and be loved back, the moment ends as quickly as it began. I move Ashton to the swing and try to convince her to sit to no avail. She is up and down crawling all over me, smashing parts of my body that were not intended to touched much less mauled by little feet.
The kid in me decides to play back. I begin to tickle her. We have fun at first. Then, it happens. My daughters precious little feet take it too far. Her heel meets the bridge of my nose. No big deal, right. WRONG!!!! I hear a crack, push her away and fight back the tears. In my emotion, I shout, "I think she just broke my nose". I fall to the floor, and despite my best efforts to fight back tears, I begin to cry. The snot comes, only it's not snot at all. Beautiful, adorable Belle has given me a bloody nose!
Brian is poking at it, making sure it's not broken. I'm trying to remember how to hold my head to make the bleeding stop. And, Belle, though she knows something isn't exactly right, is oblivious for the most part. Are you laughing yet?
I thought about stopping here to make some deep theological comparison between the events of the evening and our relationship with God, but I'll leave that for you to explore on your own blog spot. What is deep and theological about this evening is the great love that I still have for both my children. Eventually my tears and bleeding stopped, but the headache and slight swelling still remain as I write.
I thought that being pooped on, peed on and thrown up on numerous times was true initiation into motherhood, until tonight. The initiation to parenthood just comes in stages.
As I put my children to bed, we said our prayers, and I told them that I loved them. I said my own quick prayer, as I always do, that they would be safe through the night so I could hear their sweet voices and see their little faces again in the morning. In my mind, I couldn't help but think how precious every moment with them is - even the ones that are painful. I want to somehow tuck this day away in a treasure box of memories that I can recall when I am 90 and walking down the aisle at my granddaughter's wedding.

(Now just imagine Cinderella's tune playing in the background)

So, THIS is love...

So I Had a Bad Day

2007-02-16T17:08:00.001-05:00

We all have bad days. I had one on Friday. I made it through though. In the midst of it, I wanted to wallow in self pity and the woes of my life. Of course, it didn't last for long because God ever so gently reminded me that most people would give almost anything to have my woes, and I certainly did not want anyone elses woes. I suppose the grass is always greener on the other side. Life just wasn't feeling as adventurous as I thought it would be (or at least in the areas I wanted it to be ~ HA!HA!) Then, I was reminded of this great quote from one of the Peter Pan movies. Wendy Lady says to Pan, "So, your adventures are over?" Pan replies, " No, Wendy Lady. To live, to live would be a grand adventure". So, I will live. And, don't fret. I'm sure you will hear all about in some blog I write in the wee small hours of the morning.
Why am I writing about having a bad day? I'm not really sure. I suppose because I wanted to explain my wonderful headline, or because I wanted to have the opportunity to say how thankful I am for my husband, my children, my family and friends. I am thankful for life. It may not always be perfect. It may not always be the way I enivisioned it my mind. But, in the end, I am where God intended me to be for the moment. That one thing I can say with confidence.
Mostly though, I think just wanted the chance to say...

SO, I HAD A BAD DAY!

It happens to the best of us.

Speaking of Faithfulness

2007-02-16T17:07:00.001-05:00

Sunday mornings are always busy at my house. I awake to a hungry infant, followed by a hungrier toddler. My husband is already at work, and I am left to get everyone fed, dressed and ready. And, personally, I think we've have mastered the routine.
This morning though, when I entered my bathroom to put in my contacts, I notice a yellow piece of paper on the bathroom counter. It was a request for prayer. It was 8:30 and 1st service at GenesisChurch.tv was starting. I immediately began to pray. God's faithfulness kept coming to mind.
When I got to church, my initial goal was to make sure that everyone was OK. But, as I entered the sanctuary for worship, I found myself captivated by the presence of the Lord. I stood in the back for worship. In the midst of singing, the presence of the Lord broke through in such a powerful way. For those who don't understand that terminology, it was a moment when we could all catch a glimpse of what it will be like to be in His presence in heaven forever (for you theology geeks like me, we would call that "the already, but not yet" phenomenon). As we sang the words "you are holy", my spirit kept saying and faithful (and faithful and faithful). At this point, I had no clue that the Lord had impressed on my husband to talk about his recent journey in rediscovering God's faithfulness.
We continued to sing, but 2 Timothy 2:13 kept playing in my mind, "If we are faithless, He remains faithful; for He must be true to who he is". When Brian began to speak, my eyes began to fill with tears. It was amazing that God had directed my heart to the same place as my husband's heart. And, it was moving to see members of our congregation being touched as well.
These last few weeks have been heart wrenching at times. As a spouse of someone on the pastoral staff, I know that each and every member of the staff yearn to know Christ and make Him known. I watch them strive for the vision God has placed in their hearts. I have seen them glory in victory and wrestle with agony of defeat. And, even though I'm not the one doing the work, I have still asked where God was at times. And, the bottom line is still this...
God is faithful. And we do what we do to make Christ known. I think if you will just read 2 Timothy 2:8-13 with me, you will understand what I am trying to say.

REMEMBER JESUS CHRIST, RISEN FROM THE DEAD, DESCENDANT OF DAVID, ACCORDING TO MY GOSPEL, FOR WHICH I SUFFER HARDSHIP EVEN TO IMPRISONMENT AS A CRIMINAL; BUT THE WORD OF GOD IS NOT IMPRISONED.
FOR THIS REASON I ENDURE ALL THINGS FOR THE SAKE OF THOSE WHO ARE CHOSEN, THAT THEY ALSO MAY OBTAIN THE SALVATION WHICH IS IN CHRIST JESUS AND WITH IT ETERNAL GLORY.
IT IS A TRUSTWORTHY STATEMENT:
For if we died with Him, we shall also live with Him;
If we endure, we shall also reign with Him;
If we deny Him, He also will deny us; (ouch! I didn't write this folks...)
If we are faithless, He remains faithful; for He must be true to who He is.

I cannot tell you the countless number of times I have quoted this scripture, and it has set me at rest. For instance, when I was 28, still single and feeling as if I was going out of my mind...or when my Down Syndrome brother prayed for Jesus to take him to meet Him so people would stop making fun of him...or when my Mamaw passed away...or when my husband felt as if all his hard work was crumbling in his hands...or, I could recount a thousand memories when these verses have helped me hold steadfast when all I wanted to do was give up or give in or blame God for being absent or just because I wanted to ask Him "why?". These verses have reminded me of who He is and why I do what I do.
Now, I am sure that many of you have experienced things in your lifetime that are so much worse, but this scripture still holds true. So, how and when has he been faithful to you? And, what scriptures hold the same kind of strength for you? I'd like to know.